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Forget December it wont be better [Saturday December 30th, 2006 at 12:20am] [ mood | sad ] [ music | forget december ] Alright this was deleated but whatever im bored and have nothing better to do with my life then waste it writing about stuff no one cares about. So you ever see something that just makes you want to weep? Like something stupid? Like, it wouldnt even matter at all? Yeah...its gay. Well New Years is comming up which im trying to look at it as a good thing...so i've desided to go through the year and sometimes i remember. January Well i started the new years at Hollys house and we were making mini tacos and we hear her phone going off and were like why is it going off? Well we were like 2 minutes late for the new year so we stayed in 2005 for 2 more minutes then we should have, then we temporarally broke her air matress and used a whole roll of tape to fix it which didnt do anything but waste a bunch of tape. The next day her dad just popped it back in place. Figures. Febuary Yeah...i dont think anything happend in Febuary...gay March Marti Gras! Yeah i dont remember really anything but dancing with nick weldon and talking about a depressing song and being shooed away from a not-so-private conversation...OH and i remember "i never had a dream come true" Me and Leah went to our self-esteem raising rollorblading trip, and ever since then were like "yeah this weekend were going" and we havent yet...wow, talk about procrastionation March  was also leahs birthday party when Meagan, Tiffany, Jessie and I stayed up in leahs basement and cried over music videos...the first of the "fantasitc 4-izzle" do-be experience April It was battle cry and thats when the jason phase started...and the first time i ever played halo. That weekend was so much fun i loved it even if looking back i was like why? but reading over somethings i forgot happend and then thinking about what was going on at the same time and how diffrent it is now... Then the next day was when me and john got into a fight...mmm, good times. Then April was when we created the Fantastic 4 and your beautiful was our song, and its ironic that its on MTV like...this second. We went to Myrtle Beach which was simply amazing. May  There were times that im glad happend and then at the same time i think people forget about...but i wont name them. June Schools out! I remeber  it being about -20 degrees out side and swimming. I remember someone hitting my neighbor in the head with the carrot which my mom probley JUST forgot about. And after school i remember going to papas? random. AND leon riding in the trunk of amandas car. And Phil is like "i love leah...i love leah...i love leah" July John, Joel, Holly and Tiffany had parties. Parties are always fun. We went to CAMP. And some of those quotes that were said/did there are still being said to this day. Like the "what happens if you eat a dead body?" and "punching brick walls."  And then there was like "i like phil...no i dont...i love leah...i still do...leah wont be with me cry cry cry. There was the "hey by the way i've had a girlfriend for about a million years" There was Jeff and Tommy and Britney and Jiffy! I love them all! Playing Telephone, the wedding song, playing destiny, finding out im supost to be with both john and jeff but i cant be with either because of jurasic park and the titanic. There is just SO many things that were just great about camp. I cant wait until this year. Also thats when we hated Jason, Phil and Leon It was also the month where the fantastic 4 pretty much broke up John, Jessie Tiffany Me and Leah pretty much hung out all the time. August I had my surprize party, which is also when all the holly-leon drama started. Now you want to talk about good times? Those are the days. We had our 2nd anual good day day and saw step up which,by the way, i love. We had our laguna beach dinner which we said we would do every month but havent done since then...what did i say procrastionarers. September Canoeing trip which wasnt that fun then but is fun looking back on "if i ever suggest hikeing...punch me in the face" "If i ever suggest canoeing again...punch me in the face...we should go canoeing again!" Then there was jessies party which i cant really remember, i remember going home and getting mcdonalds and jumping on the trampoline at night. Phil told me i pretty much suck and he could careless about me. Theres a warm fuzzy feeling Holly and leon thing was still going on Holly had her party and so did nick and both were fun. We tried the fantastic 4 thing again...didnt work   October Homecoming, which was really fun, but kind of the point where my friends changed. I got much closer with Courtney. Phil told me i pretty much suck and he could careless about me. Theres a warm fuzzy feeling Marcia Quit and we got Kelly as a coach, oh what a joy it was. Pretty much when i started to like someone, then didnt, then did. Its very confusing. Courtney had her halloween party where joel was funny. November My birthday, thanksgiving more drifting...gayness? December   That would be...now Wow that took...forever and actually made me really sad. Lame. 3 || reply || edit

Must exasuting to loose your own game [Tuesday December 19th, 2006 at 9:31pm] [ music | How to touch a girl- jojo ] im bored so i figured why not? plus its not myspace. So i love akwardness :) I'm soooooooo excited for christmas break (other than cheerleading EVERYDAY  and christmas and new years and after christmas when we go ice skating :) :) :) X10  So im super excited for this thursday im going over courtneys and we are going to watch the O.C all seasons and John Tucker Must Die and play a game and do fun stuff and talk about our "boy" situations and we will have a fun time.  other than school and a few other things everything is great...so...yessss 0 || reply || edit

Ahhh...survays my favorite [Sunday December 10th, 2006 at 12:34pm] [ mood | pissed off ] [ music | Center of Attention- Jackson Waters ] Part 1: The Birth of You Were you a planned baby?: yes Were you the first?: nope my sister would be first  Who was present at your birth?: ...doctors? my mom..dad? i dont know Were your parents married when you were born?: yes What is your birthdate?: November 12th 1990 Part 2: The Family Are your parents married or divorced? married An only child?: no one sister If you have siblings are you oldest, middle, or youngest?: youngest What are your sibling's names?: Allison Which parent do you get along with best?: Depends What do you fight about with your parents? Argue Do you have step parents?: Naw Part 3: The Friends Do you have more than one best friend? I dont know about this one..i would have to say out of ALL  my friends its leah because i can talk to her....i can tell you whos not my best friend though. What do you like to do when you are together? anything Do you share the same interests?:  most Which friends can you tell anything to?: I'll get back to you on this one Part 4: Your Personality How high/low is your self esteem?:  at the moment? extreamly low Do you get depressed about things easily?: upset..very very upset Are you an extrovert (outgoing) or an introvert (reserved)?: uh...i'd say extrovert Are you happy?: At the moment? not at all... earlier? yes Do you live life to the fullest?:  I dont cure cancer but  i like to think i do Part 5: Appearance Are you comfortable with the way you look? there are some things i would change but for the most part yes  Describe your hair? blonde...straight..about to be dyed How do you dress? how ever i feel..but i guess preppy? i dont know  Part 6: The Past Were you a strange child?: no i was cute What did you used to love that you no longer do? dance...wait...maybe not Do you have the same friends?: no we just grew apart Was there anything in your past that was traumatizing? i dont think so  Part 7: The Future Are you scared of growing old?: i dont know...i dont want to get old  Do you want to get married?: of course Part 8: The Outdoors Do you prefer indoors or outdoors?: both...depends on the condition. Favorite Season: Summer...or Fall...but mostly Summer Do you like walking in the rain?:  Sometimes, i like watching it better Part 9: Food Are you a vegetarian?: Some would argue with me What is your favorite food?: chinese or mexican  What food makes you want to gag? cooked mushrooms and malt-o-meal...yuck What is your favorite dessert? Cheesecake What is your favorite restaurant?: Don Pablos  are you a fussy eater? no Part 10: Relationships and Love Are you single or taken?: Single Do you like anyone?: Im not sure on this one  If taken who is the lucky guy/girl?: Well Adam Brody has my heart... Do you think love is the best feeling in the world?: Im sure Do you believe in love at first sight?: No  Today...was....interesting. Lets just say i cant wait until christmas break. 0 || reply || edit

Conformity [Sunday November 26th, 2006 at 9:54pm] [ mood | gloomy ] [ music | Our Flag is White- This Providence ] He always wanted to say things. But no one understood. He always wanted to explain things. But no one cared. So he drew. Sometimes he would draw and it wasn't anything. He wanted to carve it in stone, or write it in the sky. He would lie out on the grass, and look up in the sky, and it would only be him, and the sky, and the things inside that needed saying. And it was after that, that he drew the picture. It was a very beautiful picture. And when it was dark, and his eyes were closed, he could still see it. And it was all of him, and he loved it. When he started school, he brought it with him. Not to show anyone, just to have with him like a friend. It was funny about school. He sat in a square, gray desk. Like all of the other square gray desks. And he thought it should be red. And his room was a square, gray room. Like all of the other rooms. And it was tight, and close, and stiff. He hated to hold the pencil and the chalk, with his arms stiff and his feet flat on the floor, stiff, with the teacher watching and watching. And then he had to write the numbers. And they weren't anything. They were worse than the letters that could be something when you put them all together. And the numbers were tight and square, and he hated the whole thing. The teacher came and spoke to him. She told him to wear a tie like all of the other little boys. He said he didn't like them. She said it didn't matter. After that they drew. And he drew all yellow, and it was the way he felt about morning, and it was beautiful. The teacher came again and smiled down at him. What's this, she asked? Why don't you draw something like your friend's drawing? Isn't that beautiful? It was all questions. After that his mother bought him a tie. And he always drew airplanes and rocket ships like everyone else. And he threw the old picture away. And when he lay out alone looking at the sky, it was big, and blue, and all of everything. But he wasn't anymore. He was square inside, and gray, and his hands were stiff, and he was like everyone else. And that thing inside that needed saying, it didn't need saying anymore. It had stopped pushing. It was crushed. Stiff. Like everything else. ______________________ So im sleeping and Dave and Tiffany walk in my room and they say "get up get up get up" and i want to kill people. Then i hear that they threw rocks at my window i guess that it makes it all better. We went to leahs and played with matches and talked and drank hot chocolate. So my best moment of the day is this... So we are at church and im wearing a head band Jason: So i like your bandanna thing Leah: A headband?  Emily: Yeah its a headband, i dont know who doesnt know what a head band is, jason.  And that isnt funny to anyone unless you've seen the Mad TV laguna beach the hills thing so watch it and you will laugh because it was un-intentonal that i quoted it and forgot his name was jason i hate the internet 0 || reply || edit

and i thought i was done with this [Sunday November 26th, 2006 at 2:39pm] [ mood | confused, thinking ] [ music | christmas music ] life: .:. High School: armada .:. Junior High: Armada .:. Elementary: Armada .:. Favorite Soda: Mountain Dew .:. Favorite weather: Nice, Warm or Kinda chilly but sunny Do You: .:. Like someone: not really .:. Want more piercings: not really .:. Want a tattoo: one day...maybe Last: .:. Person talked to/texted on the phone?: Um..i think...i dont remember .:. Person IMed on-line? i pretty much just use that to put up an away message .:. Movie watched: Shes The Man .:. Blue or red?: Blue .:. Spring or Fall?: Fall Random stuff: .:. Do you speak a different language?: not well, and not alot .:. How old do you act?: i dont know...my age? .:. Do you have any pets?: lots and lots .:. Mood?: fkdhsafd The 4 W's Questions: Whos in the room with you?: My sister and mom What was the last thing you ate? An Orange What color pants are you wearing?: black What is blue?: my printer What are you wearing on your feet?: skin What instant messaging service do you use?: aim What do you wear more, jeans or shorts?: jeans Where is your mom?: in the living room Where do you sleep?: in my bed Where did you get the shirt you are wearing?: Forever 21 __Which is Better With The Preferred Sex__ 067. Cute or Sexy: Cute 068. Lips or Eyes: Eyes 069. Hugs or Kisses: both 070. Short or Tall: tall 071. Easygoing or serious: easygoing 072. Romantic or Spontaneous: Spontaneous 073. Muscular or Skinny: muscular and skinny 074. Sensitive or Loud: a little bit of both 075. Hook-up or Relationship: relationships. 076. Sweet or Caring: both 077. Trouble Maker or Hesitant one: More trouble then hesitant ___Have You Ever___ 078. Kissed a Stranger; ha ha...yes 079. Drank Bubbles?: drank? uh..i think actually 080. Lost glasses/contacts: yes 083. Got an X-ray and on what?: yes, arm ankle 084. Have You Broken Someones Heart?: Naw 085. Had your heart broken?: Naw 087. Cried When Someone Died: yes 088. Cried At School and why?: yes... people ___Do You Believe In___ 089. God: yes 090. Miracles: yes 091. Love At First Sight: no 092. Ghosts: kinda 093. Aliens: no 094. Magic: no 095. Heaven: yes. 099. Horoscopes: no but their fun 100. Vegetarianism: yes ___________________________________________________________________________________________ PRESENT. 01. Is your hair wet? nahh 02. Is your Cell phone right beside you? no its in my purse 03. Do you miss someone? no 04. are you wearing makeup? yeah 05. are you wearing chapstick? no, but now i want some 06. are you cold: my toesies 07. are you tired: kinda..its sunday 08. are you excited: no 09. are you watching tv? no 10. are you wearing pajamas: no PAST. 01. recently done anything you regret: kinda 02. ever stuck gum under a desk: i dont know..i think in jayes 03. ever kicked someone: yeah but not meanly 04. ever trip over your own feet? all the time 05. ever cried so hard you almost threw up? no, but to the point where i counldnt breath TODAY. 01. have you cursed: no 02. have you yelled at someone: no. 03. have you gotten mad at someone: nope 04. have you cried: no 05. have you called more than 3 people: no anti-social 06. have you im'd more than 3 people: no Q 01: Is there a person who is on your mind right now? A 01: yeah, lots of people actually Q 02: Where is the last place you went? A 02: Church, Gas station, Doughnut shop Q 03: Who is the last person you called? A 03: i dont remember Q 04: who do you like more, your mom or dad? A 04: both fool Q 05: do you have any siblings? A 05 :yes a lovely sister Q 06: do you smile often? A 06: always Q 07: do you think that someone is thinking about you right now? A 07: everyone in the whole world...no Q 08: do you wish on stars? A 08: yes Q 09: do you untie your shoes every time you take them off? A 09: no im lazzzy Q 10: when was the last time that you cried? A 10: Yesterday, i was emotional and i was about to see my grandparents...and we were in the gheto of detroit Q 11: do you like your handwriting? A 11: its okay Q 12: are you a friendly person? A 12: yes Q 13: who's bed did you sleep in last night? A 13: my own. Q 14: what color shirt are you wearing? A 14: red and white  Q 15: do you have any pets? A 15: lots Q 16: what is the color of your bedsheets? A 16: right now their pale pink Q 17: what were you doing at 3am yesterday A 17: making a sweet colage with leah Q 18: I can't wait until... A 18: christmas break Q 19: Is tom on your friends list? A 19: yes Q 20: look to your right. what's there? A 20: a pipe thing Q 21: where did this question go? A 21: i hate this survay Q 22: Ever cried yourself to sleep? A 22: uh...im not sure Q 23: Ever cried on your friend's shoulder? A 23: with them there Q 25: Are you normally a happy person? A 25: yes Q 26: Has anyone ever said I love you to you? A 26: yes Q 27: Is your self-esteem extremely low? A 27: not extreamely but at the moment its low Q 28: What are you listening to right now? A 28: my mom talk to my sister and the TV making gay music _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ LAYER ONE : THE OUTSIDE Name: Emily Birthday: November 12th Current Location: computer room thing Eye Color: Blue Hair Color:blonde Righty or Lefty: righty Zodiac Sign: Scorpio LAYER TWO: THE INSIDE Your fears: being alone, going in my garage or car at night and spiders Your perfect pizza: cheese and olives Goal for future: Doctor, teacher...something LAYER THREE: Your thoughts first waking up: i hate school your best physical feature: smile :) Your bedtime: when i fall asleet Your most missed memory: summer LAYER FOUR: Pepsi or Coke: mountain dew McDonald's or Burger King: Taco bell Single or group dates: depends Adidas or Nike: Don't care Lipton tea or Nestea: Dont care Chocolate or vanilla: vanilla Cappuccino or coffee: cappuccino LAYER FIVE: DO YOU? Lie: sometimes Take a shower: never...just kidding yes Believe in yourself: yes LAYER SIX: EVER? Been on stage: yes Eaten Sushi: yes Gone skating: yes, and i want to go in detroit this winter Dyed your hair: yes LAYER SEVEN:RANDOM Gotten beaten up: nope Changed who you were to fit in: no LAYER EIGHT: AGE Are you old: no How old are you? 16 What grade are you in? 11th What did you do for your last birthday: i had a party in august, i went to the mall and the movies with my sister and leah LAYER NINE: IN A GIRL/GUY Best eye color: blue or green Best hair color: brown Clothing style: if they look cute i dont care LAYER TEN: WHAT WERE YOU DOING 1 minute ago: this survey 1 hour ago: Talking to alex and jason and leah and phil 1 year ago: today? i dont know... LAYER ELEVEN: FINISH THE SENTENCE I love: you I feel: angry I hide: my feelings I miss: the summer I need: to clean my room I want: To stop doing this survay wow that was gay...very very gay 0 || reply || edit

[Sunday October 22nd, 2006 at 7:32pm] [ mood | happy ] [ music | Backstreet boys fool ] So cheerleading is over and with that is more drama. Marcia is quitting and everyones upset about it (even me) and were talking to mr.smith monday because he is a jerk. So heres my weekend since i have nothing else to write about   Friday - Stayed after to take the Anatomy test over again and that lasted until 4 then i got subway and ate and got ready and i got to the game at 6:20 (late...pssh) the game wasnt exciting but it was the last one so we had fun. After Marcia said it was her last game and she wasnt doing it anymore and she was balling and other girls were crying and i was okay. Then she gave me a ride home and in her car i start crying...then by the time we get to my house im balling too. So were fighting that because thats stupid. My siser was home. Saturday - PSAT at 7:30 then after me and dave got papas soup (because he is offically a member of the best-soup-ever club) then i came home and sllept until like 5. Around 7 i went to leah and we watched benchwarmers and failure to launch. i was dead tired Sunday - Church and i really didnt want to go i was tired and just not into it. After i came home and me and my sister talked for awhile and it was nice talking with her. Then later Joel came to pick me up and i went to his house and we did anatomy...which blows. And now i just got home...yay for weekend!  I dont want to go to school tomorrow...i dont want to go to school period. 0 || reply || edit

[Friday October 13th, 2006 at 10:34pm] [ mood | cranky ] [ music | some song i cant remember the name of ] I want to kill everyone for no reason other then the fact they are bugging me We lost the HC game...suprize suprize, plus it was frickin cold and the smarty i am didnt bring a coat or sweatshirt so Bre gave me her gloves and Joel gave me a coat..I am eternally grateful  then  i came out of the game area thing to find johns car had been towed...towd...toad? w/e. So that was bad because everyone else was having a bad day and this might cause a bad tomorrow, then i felt bad because i had a great day... Tomorrow is HOMECOMING!  I was super excited (mostly for the pep-rally) and now im just like w/e...kinda like i've been for the whole dance thing. The sunday im working at ford feild, which i going to be hell. I hate the fact that people will tell my coach straight to her face "Yeah im not going to come i have something better to do" and i say "well...i dont want to come but im going" and shes like "oh well, i need you!" Like she would EVER tell the other person they had to be there...ugh. 0 || reply || edit

[Tuesday October 3rd, 2006 at 9:40pm] [ mood | ...Parents... ] [ music | Honest-Cartel ] The O.C comes back november 2nd... yay finally a reason to live!  I hate  school, cheerleading is better, most people are okay, parents suck i put in 3 work applications thats about it... 0 || reply || edit

so kiss the clock, just for luck, what timing. 11:11 just stuck [Tuesday September 26th, 2006 at 9:45pm] [ mood | drfsjhf;dsahfjdsa ] [ music | Lets just get married- Archie Star ] So i have a weird feeling...or...mood? Whatever.. But someone i THOUGHT was my friend, we wernt super close but we were friends  told me "i hate you and could care less about you, or your friends" And as much as i "hate" him right now i cant help but feel hurt about it. I would never want him to know that i actually am hurt by his words because i know he would just be happy about it. AND i cant really tell anyone, well i can, but they just really wouldnt care because all my friends cant stand him because of what he did....boys are just plain stupid!!!! Youth group tomorrow and im actually really excited i heard that someone got their hair cut and i want to see it...but that probley wont happen, and i'll be disapointed yet again...uhh.. I hate cheerleading, i hate the team,  i hate the coach, i hate everything about it...I pretty much hate life.. Not that far So all i did was complain, this was worth it. 0 || reply || edit

[Sunday September 24th, 2006 at 10:34pm] [ mood | chipper ] [ music | Here in your Arms- Hellogoodbye ] So i got a new icon, bask in the glory of it...Chading Tannum...and that one girl who should be me, in step up No school for me tomorrow because leahs is spending the night tonight so we are both playing hookey, i know, were too cool for words.  Tomorrow Happy birthday to: Jessie and Jason! yay! 16 and 18...yay!  So i've tried fixing it...your turn.  I like where we are, When we drive, in your car I like where we are.... Here Cause our lips, can touch And our cheeks, can brush Our lips can touch here Where you are the one, the one that lies close to me Whisper's "Hello, I've missed you quite terribly" I fell in love, in love with you suddenly Now there's no place else I could be but here in your arms I like where you sleep, When you sleep, next to me. I like where you sleep... here Cause our lips, can touch And our cheeks, can brush Our lips can touch here Where you are the one, the one that lies close to me Whisper's "Hello, I've missed you quite terribly" I fell in love, in love with you suddenly Now there's no place else I could be but here in your arms Our lips, can touch Our lips, can touch...here You are the one the one that lies close to me Whisper's "Hello, I've missed you quite terribly" I fell in love, in love with you suddenly Now there's no place else I could be but here in your You are the one the one that lies close to me Whisper's hello I miss you miss you I fell in love, in love with you suddenly Now there's no place else I could be but here in your arms Here in your arms. Here in your arms. 0 || reply || edit

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